Misunderstood: The Unconventional World of Autogynephiles

June 23rd, 2018

When our sexual tastes aren’t perfectly aligned with what society allows us to enjoy, the bar of difficulty in finding someone to love, and one that will be receptive to that love, rises substantially higher. There are some men who, despite their sexual orientations, enjoy imitating Women, and this act of transformation is self-arousing. Men with this form of cross-dressing fetish engage in what is called “autogynephilia,” and it’s one of the hardest things they endure in the attempt to be accepted in intimate relationships. Autogynephilia’s Greek translation is “love of oneself as a Woman,” and is a term coined in 1989 by Dr. Raymond Blanchard to refer to a man’s tendency to be sexually aroused by the image of himself as a Woman.

We live in a world that is widely sensational and ill-informed, and because of this, a great deal of ignorance exists regarding men with these preferences. The first (and perhaps most obvious) misconception is that such men must be homosexual.  The simple fact of a male finding arousal in seeing himself as a Female doesn’t necessarily mean he’s sexually oriented toward males: many are heterosexual and still desire a relationship with a Woman. Therein lies the rub: a man coming to terms with this reality often finds himself severely stereotyped. If he’s too open about it— there will likely be a price paid for that openness, and one that will, in all likelihood, be paid through distress, isolation, and depression. Because of this, he’ll usually retreat into the security of conventional relationships and sanctioned sexual expressions allotted to his sex, or the auspices of these things, in the very least. He’ll marry a Woman and secret away his underlying urges under the naive yet prevailing logic that he can hide it all. But as Phillip K. Dick once wrote, Reality denied comes back to haunt. What is pushed underground eventually finds its way up into in the picturesque world of normalcy, slowly infecting its waters with angst and frustration. Perhaps a man in this situation thinks he can vent his desires secretly beyond the knowledge of his Wife, but this is a fool’s errand: sooner or later, the Wife, having lived with him under the terminal assumption of his normalcy, discovers the truth. His secrets are often not well understood or accepted especially when found out this way. In fact, the truth of his entire person may very well come under question, and She’s justified in that, if he’s conspired to hide something so important to him from Her knowledge. 

But this is often how it goes. Often, autogynephiles are stereotyped. Most think they are all the same: that they are perverts, predators, inverted misogynists, or just generally unwell—but this is far from the truth. Some do project a sort of inner misogyny as sometimes seen in the FemDom world. But many have a genuine love for Women and honor them. And so it’s not so smart to paint all men who enjoy seeing themselves as Women as negative: as with most things in life, there is a variety of different types, with different motives and dispositions. 

Having been served by such men before, I’ve decided to open My arms to one more again. I’m looking for a male who eroticizes femininity as a part of who he is, though he is not defined by this fetish. He must have a deep love and respect for Women and wishes to enter into a Female-led relationship: with one Woman, long-term. But I’m not looking simply for a fetishist. I want to make that crystal clear. I’m not the type of Woman who offers “sessions” by the hour, nor do I ever open My door to excessive prurience. I’m not into debauchery and cuckholding/swingers type of entertainment. I’m looking for a man who will adore Me and who wants a real relationship with a Woman. He needs to be healthy of mind and body, not weighed down with narcissism. Autogynephiles can be very self-absorbed; you must be different. You must understand what mature love is and how it differs from needy love.

In short, I want a full, broadband human being, not one who sees Me as some sort of one-dimensional image before which he unloads his fetishes. Further, he is at peace with himself, not taxed by “dysphoria” or delusional notions that he is a woman. His penchant to reflect Feminine forms within himself neither invalidates nor encroaches upon his respect for Women. 

Compatibility is important too— just as it is in all other types of relationships. He understands that relationships are forged in chemistry. Mutual priorities and similar likings alone are not enough to sustain a relationship, though. Centering the relationship around the man’s fetish also isn’t what I’m wanting to do. This union will be about serving Me as the true embodiment of the Feminine Divine, with the man as a worshipful adherent to Feminine joys and aesthetics. His desire to transform himself will be indulged but in service to and honor of the Female, and Myself. 

What other qualities do I seek?

1. His fetishes don’t consume him.

2. He bows before Women in gratitude, recognizing them as inspiration to what propels him internally, knowing he could never be a Female, but strives to embody the Feminine in his worship, all the same. 

3. He understands and accepts that fundamentally he’s still male and won’t allow the lines to blur. 

4. He is older. Younger men don’t have the wisdom I seek: they are still evolving. It takes time for males to come to terms with these drives and to know how to properly manifest them.

5. He knows that being exposed and feeling vulnerable in the right hands is a difficult gift to find. He cherishes it. 

6. He’ll value a relationship with the right Woman, and so he will be grateful and attentive toward making it work.

7. He enjoys traveling the world, and his career permits him to travel at least twice a year.

What I’m NOT looking for:

1. Career fetishists and casual BDSM types. I have nothing against BDSM but it attracts a fair sum of prurient hedonists more in love with acts than the essence of a deep, meaningful relationships. 

2. Anyone overly sexual and preoccupied with their fantasies to the exclusion of deeper sincerity. 

3. Cuckholds who are simply looking for bisexual hijinks. Again, strict focus on fetishes is not what I’m after. My dominance is real but it’s organic and is expressed how I desire. I don’t and won’t follow a man’s scripts and psycho dramatics. 

If you think you have all the qualities I seek, I welcome your introductory message. Be prepared for a lengthy vet. Live between the coasts of New Jersey and New Hampshire. Please be between the ages of 38-58. 

You may call Me on Niteflirt or write Me on Fetlife, if you wish — starting July 1, 2018. I may add an email to this blog to use as well.

Thank you!

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Below are links to help males (and the Women who love them) who may want to better understand Autogynephilia.

A History of Autogynephilia

Autogynephilia and the Typology of Male-to-Female Transsexualism: Concepts and Controversies

What Autogynephilia is, and what is it not; a brief note

Pornography and Autogynephilia in the narratives of adult transgender males

Mailbag: A Journey Beyond

February 28th, 2015

 
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Dear Ms. Saharah Eve:
(Original publication 2014/10/17)
I have been following your website now for several months and I wanted to let you know how impressed I am with it.  I really appreciate your patience with me. This is probably going to sound weird this day and age but as a submissive male I have been finding it very hard to find Women online who do this in real life. I’ve been promised real time meetings after having spent considerable time trying to vet myself to on-line Dominas and professionals. I’m sorry if that offends with consideration to your female supremacist views but it’s a reality I have had to admit to. Women like yourself are not easy to find. I am getting weary of dealing with Dominas playing the part to make money and leading you on to believe you can one day become something more than a internet sub. I don’t have a problem with this per se, but I want something real. They turn out to be online dominants only and I am afraid it is making me bitter and cynical about the whole thing. I truly believe in a female led relationship. Being under the control of a Woman who likes in being a leader and leading Her man to be a better person must have led me to search for this.
I hate feeling like this, but I feel like getting acquainted with yet another woman who seems to understand submissive males will only result in more disappointment. How do I stop this from happening to me? Am I doing something wrong? Am I looking in the wrong places?
Frustrated and confused,
DEAR B:
For some time now I’ve noticed something peculiar in the pop culture of female dominance—something that appears to be growing as the mainstream accepted fetish play du jour and the adult industry catches up in service to it.  That “thing” is the tendency in businesses to capitalize, simply, on what’s desirable.  I see it in every area of the market today from fashion design to big tech.  If a celebrity wears something flashy it’s not long before everyone has to have it, too. When Apple comes out with a slick new desktop model or phone design, many computer companies attempt to emulate the look. Following what’s hot and trendy is effective in getting attention and then success—however short-lived that success may be.  It’s always been like that: where there are a few originators, there are many, many more wagon jumpers who say, “me too!”  They mimic and emulate.
And I find it’s no different in the world of Female dominance or “Femdom,” sorry to say, and that’s a bit of an understatement. Even writing the word “Femdom” feels…weird to Me, not because of the literal contraction it represents but rather the consumable caricature unto itself that it has become and the confusion it creates.  This is My opinion and I don’t intend to offend anyone.  I see Women on the internet dressed up in fetish Mistress attire, domestic teacher clothing, studded leather, etc., but how does a man such as you decipher whether it’s merely a role? Does it really represent styles of choice, or is it simply a temporary necessity?  I’m recognizing that there is a lot of performance art and top-service fantasy play bound up in the phrase “Femdom.” So much that’s about all the phrase represents now, sadly. And add to that the commercial efforts of sex workers, cam college Girls, internet Princesses, Pro-Dominatrices, etc., who play a Femdom to make a little extra money off to the side for college, etc., and you can see how hard it can be for the average male, who is looking for something beyond the temporary, to sift through.  And just to make this a little more confusing, this is not to say that I think a Woman who capitalizes on male interest is, by default, a sham.  It is instead to say that a man looking for a dyed-in-the-wool potential Mistress has to be able to observe Her closely and consider Her message and Her true character first before devoting his time and energy into Her.  Observation skills have to be on point, for the ability to beguile is getting easier with modern technology in this connected world of cut and paste plagiarism and casual intellectual property theft.  Anyone can build a blog in minutes, open up a social networking account here and there, post a few hot selfies, and presto: a newly minted Princess, Mistress, Domme, Humiliatrix, Goddess, etc. is born.
I realize that it’s a fact of nature beauty does interesting things to men from middle school and up and Women tend to know this. When a man sees a Woman he thinks is beautiful, he is projecting himself unto her, where he can immediately build her up in his mind without knowing much about Her. Many guys skip past the bios and go right for the galleries once the word “Mistress” is appended before a Woman’s stage name. Many men use the potential of a Woman’s body to serve their own fetishes as a basis for wanting to “serve” Her. For these men the fantasy-play is where their submission begins and ends.
But what about a man who wants to deeply consider the message of each Woman and approach only those who appear to have the taste and understanding necessary to truly enslave him?  The “culture” of fetish has become a commercial land where easily beguiled prey are constantly reinforcing the dysfunction of the market they support.  In such a realm, there is no intention of bringing slavery to any tangible level of reality: it’s a continuum of fantasy and hedonistic transactions and, sadly, little more than that.
From countless conversations with men seeking dominance beyond play, I can see how this creates a hoard of cynical and dispossessed men.  Their cynicism often becomes a bit of a self-fulfilling prophecy, too: the more jaded they become to the notion of serving a Woman the more rigidly self-defeating their prospects of finding the real deal becomes.  It permeates their judgment and colors the way they see any Woman who holds a whip or calls Herself a Mistress.
Some probably glance at My online presence and its imagery and they assume they know what they’re seeing based upon everything else they’ve seen before. They may focus on how I benefit materially from My sensual nature and penchant for owning men, even engaging in some fetish activities with them, but if an observer would look a little further into Me he will find a stark dissonance between what I do compared to the per-hour commercial venture of a cam college Girl or Pro Domina.  Talk to many professional Dominas and I’m sure one can quickly realize that many of them (but to be fair, not all) consider what they do as strictly a business, and a business often kept neatly away from the rest of their lives, at that. The Women are certainly skillful and beautiful. Their photos are alluring and ads are glossy.  The things they say are calculatingly “on” for the clientele they seek to attract.  But to the man seeking something more, asking how many actually live this way of life after the sessions are over or the camera stops rolling is a question worth asking. It’s a deceptively simple question to ask. At first, the bar set with this question seems easy enough to reach.  “Well, I happen to be a personal friend of Mistress so-and-so and I know she has slaves in real life.” one might answer.
Yes, yes. Ho hum. But really…how many are actually doing this in real life, 24/7? How many have s-l-a-v-e-s? Such questions matter to the more serious seekers looking to embrace the realities of slavery beyond temporary escapism and role play.
This question has more than one dialectological onionskin to patiently peel away. It seems there’s often a strange sort of sub-culturally reinforced wink and nod that’s shared among those supposedly in the know, but it’s really a mirror house of semantics one steps into when he asks that pure question with the hope of a pure answer. The docile, prurient hubby of that Mistress So-and-So who accompanies Her to fetish events in matching latex does not, by definition, make him a slave by any stretch of the imagination, nor does the weekender she has off to the side who has a “house cleaning fetish” and later likes to be strung up naked and pelted with tomatoes in the back yard—though many would ignorantly consider him a “slave,” too. The simple truth is that 999 times out of 1000, these men aren’t slaves, and if you listen to their personal philosophies where slavery is concerned (if they are so kind enough to share them), this becomes apparent enough through their own words. The depth of their understandings, of how far they take the concepts of slavery and apply them with any dash of seriousness in their own lives might as well amount to theory stitched in intellectual silly string. It is, more often than not, an adult game at play and the popular imagery we associate with it is in service to the fantasies that fuel them. Saying this too loudly might ruffle feathers, but what is true isn’t always easy for people to accept and I won’t apologize for speaking the truth.
And lest there be any doubt, I don’t have any problem with casual D/s; I can appreciate the fulfillment it provides. Neither do I have a problem with internet Princesses, FinDoms, Pro Dominas, etc. I give professionals, both on-line and real-time, every bit of respect they deserve. What I do have an issue with is the mingling of terms: how uncool it has become to refer to oneself as a submissive rather than a slave, when submissive or even “bottom” would be far more accurate.  Blurred lines only serve to confuse those seeking slavery.  The same goes for some Professionals, too: it has become uncool to admit you’re into service topping males and that you charge a fee for it.  The hypnotic assertions and truisms that justify the role playing sound so good to a great many people who like erotic games, but this allows a vast number of men (and Women) to coast unthinkingly along. Slavery isn’t a big deal, right? It’s just a part-time gig at a dungeon or a thing I do on the weekends.  I mean, slavery isn’t actual slavery, right? Think again.  Consensual slavery is the biggest form of human commitment there is and a Saturday night out in hot fetish regalia does not put you any closer to embracing reality than furries do in dressing up as horses and lions at other kin conventions.
So perhaps I’m preaching to the choir and you may understand all of that. Your prevailing question may simply be how to spot the bologna more easily. To this, I can offer the following advice to those like you who are searching for something a little more than fantasy role-playing.

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  1. Pay attention to Her philosophies and how serious it appears She takes this way of life. Claims of doing this in real life, of having “personal slaves” have to extend beyond fanciful social media blurbs and pouting selfies with likely boyfriends.  Is She intellectually engaged in being who and what She is?  Is there apparent evidence of this? Do Her online presentations feel less like reflections of the human soul and more like a storefront capitalizing on all the usual trappings? If so, proceed with a great deal of caution: all there may be there is a sensual ghost with one crumby and ultimately singular objective: to take your money.

 

  1. Watch for plagiarism and the viral patterns of intellectual property theft we often see in Femdom Land. I’m not one to speak up often about this, as it does feel a bit like I’m tooting My own horn, but I do see some Women borrowing heavily from Me at times.   That alone isn’t something I take offense to, but when it’s clear they or adult companies are just capitalizing on the things they “picked up” from Me and the imagery I present here, it does tend to be a little disappointing.   My interest has always been to inspire imagination and desire in authentic Female dominance and authentic male submission, not create a visual playbook for posing on either side of the fence.   Sellouts borrow liberally from the lives of authentic Mistresses to camouflage themselves and their true intents. Learn how to decipher them.  Study the images they present to the world and the language they use.  Does it seem authentic or does it seem borrowed?  Someone who can’t turn out a single original thought or idea from Her own head should be held suspect. So…ask questions. Have conversations. Test Her understanding of the very thing She claims to practice.

 

  1. I hope what I’ve written here helps you and men like you who seek a deeper level of D/s.  As a supplement to this post, I highly suggest you refer to an earlier article on this issue.   Good luck on your journey! 😀

(Original post:  2014/09/06)

SaharahEve's Slave Ethos

September 5th, 2014

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Delilah and Samson

August 15th, 2014

Obviously the point of keeping slaves for a Mistress is to be freed of all menial concerns and chores. This being said, there are some small domestic tasks I find enjoyable and I will make a point of taking into My hands. One of them is the shearing of a slave. I have to admit I get a special gratification out of this innocent ritual.  Am I unconsciously acting out the myth of Delilah and Samson? Maybe so. Although I don’t feel much affinity with the caricatured biblical temptress, we do share a similarity: My purpose in removing My slave’s hair is to enforce his enslavement. By depriving him of that individuality, I am effectively transforming him in such a way that he will hardly recognize himself when looking into a mirror, driving it home the hard way that his body is My exclusive property to do with as I wish.  When the slave sees himself so utterly modified that he knows he no longer relates to the face of the free person he once had.  What he sees instead is a depersonalized creature.  The poor beast is left with no other choice than to embrace his image of slavery—the shorn head—and do so with sincere gratitude.  I have no qualms admitting that I enjoy removing My slave’s hair as if I were peeling off any remnant of his former life.  The male that emerges from that chrysalis will undoubtedly prove to be totally subjected to My will, having no other hope than to serve Me and to remain in My good grace.  Have I not become all his life?
But unlike Delilah, when I shave off the hair of one of My males My intent is surely not to weaken him.  On the contrary: I am significantly empowering him.  By depriving him of this physical attribute of his personality I am doing more than simply performing the symbolic act of degrading him to his subservient status; I am also freeing him of all his fears, apprehensions and inhibitions.  Having lost everything—freedom, possessions, friends and relations—his unique and sacred ambition is to serve and please Me, his Owner.  This is My gift to My slave, this is the power I am instilling in him: having no concern for his own well being or safety he will obey My orders without even a second thought as nothing could ever matter more to him than satisfying My whims.  Such selflessness is tantamount to invincibility.  And I will accept nothing less from My slaves.
 
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On the Trendy Ghettoization of Female Dominance

July 30th, 2014

There is a particular pattern of communication I’ve grown accustomed to over the years while entertaining the letters sent to Me from men, and it happens much like clockwork: the seasons change and suddenly there are several new messages in My inbox inquiring about My availability for BDSM sessions. These questions, as familiar as they are, never cease to perplex Me. I have been writing for years how I do not offer sessions and how I do not charge an hourly rate, or see the exchange of dominance and submission between a Woman and a man as transactional, but no matter how well I write these sigils across My site to ward off the “pro mojo,” its acolytes show up, nonetheless, with hats in hands. I turn them away as nicely as I can, of course, but the magnitude at which men believe they can purchase time in My presence never fails to niggle at the back of My head a little. On one hand, I am flattered, I suppose, that some men would part with gobs of money just to be near Me. On the other hand, that is not where the deal ends as far as many men are concerned, unfortunately. Men who are willing to throw their money at a Woman to role play dominance come seeking a service, and in that vein, I am awestruck by their sense of entitlement, if not incomprehension.
To be clear, the service they seek is not My particular gripe. The practice of men paying to be flogged, feminized, humiliated, etc., is as old as the hills. The Dominatrix profession itself started from within brothels catering to the eccentric needs of men before it branched out into being a “thing” in and of itself in the contemporary age. Dominatrices today operate in a shadow world between sexual iconoclasm and fantasy-fulfillment—a perpetual gray area frequented by the prurient interests of fetishists, masochists, and sex tourists. This in and of itself is quite fine: I fully support Women choosing any path they wish. The path of the Dominatrix is certainly one worthy of respect. It fulfills a need in men to temporarily submit and it can even be thought of as a “gateway drug,” in that it encourages men to get their feet wet with submitting to Women whereafter they may choose to explore the world of the Alpha Female with more depth if they dare.  My gripe, as it turns out, is the association such men make between Me and the Pro Domina. While I certainly take no issue with Women who choose to pursue the arts of the Dominatrix, the schism between a Woman like Myself and the average Pro is, really, like night and day. No, I do not have a dungeon or a domestic-themed studio. No, I do not cater to your fetishes. No, I do not offer a service for payment. And no, I do not associate My dominance with fashion statements in leather or latex, the trend of which started with the “bizarre sex” underground in the sixties. You can certainly give Me your money if you’d like, but in My world, it is understood as a proxy for your devotion and desire to please, not a transactional fee paid for services rendered. In other words, having money offered up to Me is a frivolous matter compared to having one’s soul offered up to Me. It is the latter I find interest in, for in that all bounties of a man flows perpetually, not just the paper bills in his wallet for a finite moment.
So with the above in mind, I openly suggest to the world that is that there are, in fact, two types of Women who wield whips in this world. First, there are the Dominatrices, who are essentially sensation-service providers to the whims and desires of their adoring male clientele. It may appear as dominant on the surface, but careful observation often reveals otherwise. Careful observation, in fact, underscores the difference between the Dominatrix and the Mistress (“Mistress” as in “Keeper” of the House). The Dominatrix archetype is often seen as having overturned social convention in the realm in which they operate, of reversing the long-established roles between Women and men in making men obedient to Female authority. Authors, activists and enthusiasts of Femdom expound with much poetry and erudition on the exuberance of the dominant Female, and yet, for all this homage paid to Female dominance, there appears to be very little of it in authentic practice within the industry that is “Femdom.” What we have instead, unfortunately, is a commercial empire wherein a bit of a charade is being played out between fetishists and sex capitalists that rise to the occasion of the natural, sensual need in men. Dominant Women pursuing a  little capitalism, especially at the expense of male interest, is not necessarily a bad thing, mind you. What I call to light is the rampant service to male sexual fantasy simply to turn a dime that has become the Femdom modus operandi du jour, with little left over for love of the wholesome reality-based craft of Female dominance in and of itself. Beneath the shiny skin of latex and leather and beyond the garish spectacle of role play, one is eventually compelled to ask what heart truly beats for the Feminine Divine in all this consumable imagery? The reality is that for many, form is more cherished than essence and aesthetic more celebrated than authenticity in the practice of wielding “control” over men. The sensual thrill seeker client merely purchases Female sensuality and escapes, temporarily, into an ephemeral illusion of Her dominance—an illusion the Dominatrix gets paid to weave. But what if that dominance goes beyond the trappings of mere Femdom? What if the dominance of a Woman is integrated into real life, beyond the service-oriented performance art?
That is where Women like Myself come in. We do not measure out our time with men by the hour or offer our craft simply as a product in and of itself. While we are certainly inclined to profit from our power in one form or another, who and what we are, as a whole, is not determined by serving the sexuality of men, as we see with the typical Dominatrix. The Mistress makes male sexuality serve Her, and therein lies a crucial and fundamental difference. Where the Dominatrix is contained in a box made of rules dictated by the underworld of the sex-fantasy industry, the Mistress is free to be who She is: there need not be any divide between who She really is and who She appears to be. She incorporates Her dominance seamlessly into the world of the real—not just the world of the pruriently bizarre—and therein lies the true power of a Woman to emerge from the abstract subcultural “ghetto” that fetish culture has carved out for Her. Her dominance is not justified and consumed merely as a pseudo-sexual service. Her dominance is all-encompassing and there is no border where we separate its extent from the larger reality of the world around us. The Mistress, in other words, is real. While She uses sexual energy to Her favor, She refuses to be isolated or segregated into a subculture built only around sexual antics and services that cater to men. The Woman next door might very well be a keeper of slaves. You may never be able to tell, judging by Her lifestyle and outward appearance, for Her status as a slave keeper is but one aspect of Her life and reality—it is not scrawled across Her in the garish colors of the fashionably eccentric and perverse.
saharahs_graceWhile I flesh out the breadth and scope of My own life, it is important for Me to note that I am not an enemy of fantasy or even male sexuality. I am far from it, in fact.  No one understands and respects the power of human sexuality more than a Keeper of consensual slaves, I hold. My note is at the purity of the vision that compels a man to serve and what inspires a Woman to receive that service with honest intent. There is plenty of great sex and fantasy fulfillment to be had in that world, but what makes it different is its goals and the center from which it operates. There are many permutations, but only one that resonates with Me and those fit for the world in which I live. In that world Woman are supreme and men serve Women to lift them up and free them from the drudgery of the menial. The servitude is real, not merely an act for a temporary sensual hiatus. So long as the fantasy in a man’s mind finds pleasure in this, he is not relegating the Woman of his dreams into virtual sex slavery to his fetishes.
Where narratives afforded by fantasy are concerned, I think another great way to demonstrate the difference is through the visual. Female power and dominance is depicted in a variety of artwork from many artists, but only a few tend to get it right in My book. My slave’s artwork exudes this understanding in paintings in that his message is uncluttered from the confusion Femdom tends to inflict upon popular consumption. Unlike many Femdom artists, Nanshakh’s work exemplifies a purity of understanding where it relates to a Mistress and Her slaves. The men are anonymized and interchangeable. The Women stride, sit, or recline imperiously over them in their beauty and dominance. Their sexuality is certainly used, but not to make men the focus of their dominance. In this world, the Women are at the center and the men are banished into the periphery—their lives only having meaning in abject servitude to and worship of Females who are rightfully enthroned in a celestial mantle above the male creature. In Nanshakh’s work, men are clearly not being “done.” They are being taken for granted. They are debased and undifferentiated. They are meaningless machine parts without the central mechanisms of life: Women. That is the message I like to extoll and it is the personal reality I live which frees Me and puts Me high above the din of the fetish industry and its male-oriented world of commonly consumed Femdom.
 
 

The Nuisances of Populated Streets and Leash Walking

July 11th, 2014

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I have never made it a secret that I find pleasure in publicly walking a slave on a leash.  Instances of Myself doing so abound in this site —  both in photos and movies.  I know I am not alone as many more wonderful Mistresses are starting to showcase their pets in this manner.  🙂  For Me personally it is one of those little things of daily life to which I am very attached.  First and foremost because I derive tremendous satisfaction from it, of course.  I always enjoy showing a man his true place — at My heel, abased and docile, as the domestic animal he is destined to be.  Station reminders are an integral part of the strict discipline I impose upon My slaves.  Secondly, I enjoy doing it in public because it engenders an increased educational value  both for the slave and the public too.  No doubt many people will be impressed by the natural elegance of an attractive Woman who casually holds a male on a leash throughout the city sidewalks and markets.  Many men, and even more importantly Women, will be seduced by the important statement it makes.  I can not help smiling when I think of all the sleepless nights I must have inflicted in this way.  Lastly, let us not forget it is very salutary for the slave’s mental hygiene and You all know how, as a responsible Keeper, I make it a point to keep My slaves perfectly healthy in this regard.  No doubt I have often expended here on the benefits for the slave to be paraded in public at the end of a leash  or even trotting on all fours beside His Keeper.
When kept on leash a slave of Mine finds his natural place and embraces the sanctity of his servile condition.  He is proud of being exposed by Me for what he truly is: a piece of property, a domesticated creature irreversibly attached to Me — pun intended.  And he certainly does not feel any shame or humiliation as his attention is entirely centered upon Me and he is only concerned with how he is besotted by My authority and instead of feeling awkward because of the gawks and bewildered looks he feels ennobled by being leashed to Me, belonging to My retinue and by participating to My stature, however menially.  The leash has deprived him of any reason -or right- for self consciousness; he knows instinctively he does not exist as a person anymore and that all eyes are upon Me.  No one pays any attention to a slave— people only see the leash and then the elegant, manicured hand that is firmly holding it.  He is mindful of doing honor to his Mistress, of having the perfect behavior She expects of him.  He is proud of having the same importance to My standing as My purse or My shoes and knows that I will expect his conduct to be at all times as spotless as any part of My attire.
It amuses Me when I hear some people  from within the Femdom crowd talk about the “public humiliation” of being taken on a leash by a Woman.  How could it possibly be humiliating for a slave to be displayed by his Owner for what he truly is: Her property.  Of course he is proud that She deigns to parade him as such.  He is thrilled She chose to take him out with Her like Her purse or Her scarf.  Some take an umbrella in case it might rain, exactly the same way as I might take a slave if I am going for a walk and I think I might have some use for him, e.g., to sit on him in the park, to get a foot massage, or carry My bags if I indulge in some impromptu shopping.  Can you imagine the joy of any of My slaves when I am so generous as to choose to take them out for such purposes?  They are even more excited than My dog —  I mean the real, canine one 😉  Were it not for their perfect training  I could find My slaves waiting sitting by the front door, the leash in their mouths.  So I wonder why so many people come up with that sentiment about humiliation.  It is a grace I bestow on a slave when I take him out on a leash.
Unfortunately, things have deteriorated in recent years thus the satisfaction I can derive from leash walking a slave in public has considerably waned.  To the point where I seriously wonder if I will keep indulging in that innocent habit of Mine much longer.  No sooner do I appear tugging a slave along that tons began to follow, tripping over themselves I might add.  It has come to the point where it takes away some pleasure and I am not sure I will keep doing that much longer.  Of course I could avoid this nuisance by sticking to deserted streets, but then unpopulated streets do defeat the purpose of the exercise, don’t they?  When I leash walk a slave I am taking My Female Supremacist lifestyle to the public square and I am making an important statement.  Yes, some Women keep their males on a leash.  Some Women rule and there is no shortage of males they can choose from to domesticate.  This is My world and I certainly am not apologetic for it; I make it a point of exercising My right to flaunt it when and where it pleases Me just the same as others are showing off their own lifestyles and choices.  This is the place I have for males in My life — at the end of My leash, at My beck and call.  My subservient males are part of My standing.  I do not see why I could not conveniently take one out on a leash in the same way a gay couple can walk hand in hand or other people choose to display their religious bonds with ostentatious costumes.  It is all about bonding after all, right? 😉
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Flavors of Psychosexual Dominance: My Philosophy Behind Smothering Slaves

June 11th, 2014

The eroticism and fun of smothering slaves…by now you realize I have a bit of a knack for it, but more broadly speaking, human nature seems to as well. Stop to think about it for a moment: how often do you see Women fantasizing about receiving this treatment? Much like foot worship, men seem naturally acclimated toward paying homage to the nether regions of Females. They can’t help fantasizing about being our footstools and seats, but the desire for this dynamic is suspiciously absent in reverse, isn’t it? Having the agency of an alpha Female, I see this simple truth and revel in smothering men, as is only right…as is only natural. My ass above them, taking the very air from their lungs, blinding them, filling their mouths and nostrils with the scents and tastes of Me…it is a reminder of the control I have over their lives, of how I encompass them wholly and weigh down heavily upon their lives. My essence permeates them and crushes them. The act of smothering, then, is not simply sexual or functional: it is deeply symbolic of the relationship shared between Me and My groveling males.
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When the Virtual Metamorphoses Into a Reality

May 14th, 2014

 
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Often times online references to “slavery” are not talking about slavery but rather the simulation of slavery; a fun fantasy adults engage in behind closed doors or a commercial venture for porn companies or Pro-Dominatrices.  For a small handful of others, slavery is a very real, choice-based way of life.

Cross-Dressing Slave's Lesson On Roe vs. Wade and Constitutional Undermining by "Anti-Women-Autonomy" State Legislators

January 26th, 2014

Of course My faithful readers know that I am always ready to use a slave for My entertainment. This is a pleasant recreation when the beast is not busy toiling for Me. Not so recreational for him, maybe, but for Me it is good fun– which is all that matters. Sometimes I particularly enjoy feminizing a male, not only is his pathetic attempts to dress like a Woman and mimic Feminine grace quite hilarious, but ridiculing the miserable creature serves multiple purposes. First it amuses Me to no end, as I’ve said already, but it is also a sound reminder for the lowly creature of his absolute inferiority to the Feminine sex, as it demonstrates how males are grotesque and inadequate when they try to resemble us Women in any way.
So I have decided to put My beast in that awkward and ridiculous situation, as I intend to give him a salutatory lesson about a few important matters. Such as the relentless abuse and misogyny displayed by some conservatives against Women, some of the despicable and cowardly legislation that is trying to get passed by all sorts of sly means. But do not let the silliness of the slave’s endeavors to act and walk like a Woman lessen or dilute the seriousness of the lessons I’m giving him. Those are important matters however lightly and humorously I am ingraining them into the servile male psyche to raise his awareness about such societal issues and make him see them in the only proper light: Mine.
Intrinsically a Mistress is always generous with Her slaves. To start with, She is already infinitely generous to tolerate them as Her slaves, of course. Not to mention to allow them to breathe. (Well, that is, when She’s not chocking them for fun ;D) But when a Keeper is condescending to lend any attention to Her males, whatever attention, She is extraordinarily generous. As, for example, when She is teaching them about anti-Women legislation, or whatever societal issues She deems important for them to learn about and to adopt Her views on the matter. And if a Mistress deigns to crop Her slaves, She is simply going out of Her way in terms of generosity. Now, what are slaves for if not to suffer at the hands of their Keepers, for Her sole satisfaction? Who would not concur there could be no better reason for male dog slaves to be degraded or subjected to harsh punishments than to provide pleasure and amusement for their Owners? That is the reason why I own My dog slaves: so that I can exploit and oppress them for My convenience and gain, naturally, but also to make them squirm and squeal under My whip, at My whim, whenever I want to vent off My annoyance for the misogyny of males in society and all the crap the despicable creatures represent. Yes, My males will suffer for this; I will make sure they pay for their sex, even though they have embraced their inferiority and servitude to Women. This is what is just and right, for this is My justice that I deign to inflict on My creatures. And I can assure you they embrace it with such fervor and gratitude. Poor things, it is really touching.
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Shaving a slave's head

September 6th, 2013

female supremacy, female supremacist, saharah eve, saharaheve, female-led relationships
Some may argue that a slave still remains a person, and why not? But to Me, that’s neither here nor there. A slave is first and foremost a s-l-a-v-e. And that is all. A commodity, a piece of property, a tool, a beast of burden, a toy or whatever his Keeper wants it to be. In My book, that means interchangeable, easily replaceable, totally expendable. Even if, as with many other Women, I will at times enjoy finding in a slave an intuitive creature who is quite capable of interesting conversation, thoughtful attentions and educated understanding. I do appreciate such precious qualities and want to be able to switch them on and off at My leisure. But it makes no difference to the basic fact that a slave is and will always remain just and only that: a slave.
It is absolutely essential that subservient males must never be allowed to forget that reality. That is why I want My slaves to be constantly reminded of their servile condition so that they could never entertain the delusion of being permitted to step out of it. And for this, there’s nothing like the good old recipes. You know that saying, clothes don’t make the man? Well, maybe so, but no clothes at all do make the slave. At least in My world, which is all that matters to Me and My males anyway. Oh yes, appearances do matter and the only piece of clothing I’ll allow My slaves is a good, sturdy, iron collar. There’s nothing like taking his clothes away to make a male feel all the extent of his lowly, servile condition.
Yet, that’s still not enough for My taste. So I recently decided to shear My slave’s hair, to further deprive him of his personality traits and ingrain even deeper in his subservient psyche the absolute extent of his abasement and depersonalization. The results went even beyond My expectations. Naked as a worm! Lol – And it worked wonders on the silly beast. It made him happy too. That is, after the initial shock. Well, anyway, I’m sure it will make him happy in the long run. The way he was expressing his gratitude immediately afterwards was quite touching. And it did improve his slavishness and eagerness to serve Me, no doubt. Once again, I’m pleased with My brilliant idea.
And those that know Me, of course I taped the whole event. I was not going to deprive Myself of the pleasure of replaying it once in a while. And in My immense generosity, I decided to share this moment with you, if only for educational purposes, for Mistresses and slaves alike.

Expectations of a Slave

May 17th, 2013

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As I have mentioned recently, I do accept that My slaves love Me.  In so doing, I know I am showing exceptional leniency and openness of mind.  It is indeed very generous of Me since by condescending to tolerate a slave’s adoration for Me, no matter how far beneath Me, how insignificant he might be as a male, I acknowledge he is still worthy of loving Me sincerely, selflessly, and humbly.
I do see it as only natural that a male should be consumed with love for Me, his Keeper.  I even accept his being haunted permanently by My beauty.  Providing his carnal desires remain strictly chastised and reigned in, I see them as conducive to the perfect servility I demand of him.  I am after all a Goddess to My lowly creature, the incarnation of the Feminine ideal, the inaccessible idol he’s sacrificing all, freedom, comfort, even security to serve for life.  I see no reason to reject his passionate love any more than I’d reject the loyal affection of My dog.  And just as with a dog, depending on My whim, at times I will reward him with My attention, even My affection.  A good slave will receive such exceptional gestures of appreciation from his Mistress as priceless gifts from his inaccessible Goddess.  He will cherish them and they will serve to reinforce his eternal devotion and gratitude for Me.  But there are also those males who, never fully resigned to their abject servitude, probably suffering from delusions of equality with their Keeper, will want to exploit Her empathy, seeing a chance to inch their way into some sentimental, reciprocal attachment with Her.  Soon, misunderstanding any benevolent signs of kindness from Her, they will begin to feel entitled to love and respect, even romance, in return for their own needy passion.
This can never be tolerated. This is tantamount to leaping on the couch for a dog in some pitiful attempt at feeling comfortable on an equal footing with his Mistress.  A slave is a slave, period.   And while a slave is still human, he must know and embrace he can never entertain any hope of getting above his servile condition.  In My house, slaves are animals, they belong to the ground at My feet, groveling.  While I welcome– on My terms, sincere displays of their absolute adoration and love for Me, and I will often graciously reward such with an affectionate pat.  I will mercilessly crush any symptoms of sentimental greed, entitlement, jealousy.  They are not the genuine expressions of the selfless, servile love I expect of My slaves but on the contrary they reveal an unhealthy resurgence of rebellious male ego.   I know the signs.  I will recognize them immediately and I will act swiftly, crushing the culprit with merciless severity.
 
 

Video Preview: Mass Mantra

October 25th, 2011

Mass Mantra: Slave Rules To Saharah EveYet another example of the power of the Female sex. They say a picture is sometimes worth a thousand words, and in this case, I think that’s right on the money. Before shooting this scene with several of My slaves, a well known bottom in the Femdom porn industry wanted to tag along in the group, making a total of five nutsacks to kick. The more, the merrier, I say. 😉